I'm a négligée

In French, "négliger" means "to neglect". A person who is neglected is a "négligé". But since I am a girl, I'm a "négligée".

Hmm... Nothing sexy about that.

One night I had a dream about J, we were talking and I was feeling a little neglected because we hardly spend any more time together. I asked him "Siguro, mas mahal mo na ang Lineage* sa akin no?" (Maybe you love Lineage more than me now. ) He answered "Oo nga eh." (Yeah it's true). Of course I abruptly woke up and thought OMG.

J and me celebrated our 2nd anniversary last August 13 by sleeping through it. Heck, I even filed a vacation leave just so I can spend the day with him. I know him too well to expect anything special so I was not that disappointed. It's still saddens me though. I want to feel special sometimes...

I've talked to Ingrid about this and she told me that I shouldn't feel that way because I'm Lila. Hmm... I wish I WAS her. At least she's getting married.

I actually am getting worried about us. We only got together once during this week. And tonight he didn't even wait for me to get home. He's already sleeping. It's as if he doesn't care about me anymore. Oh well. If he doesn't love me anymore what can I do? That's life. I'll have to move on. But still, I hope he tells me now and would not leave me hanging.

Anyhoo, I know I mustn't jump to conclusions. Maybe tomorrow will be okay.

*Lineage is an MMORPG